Otto has this obsession with toilets. Not that scatology is a fetish he indulges in. No, on the contrary, being a pig he is really concerned about the state of his abode.

Spending most of his time in the confines of a pigsty he knows very well the difference between filth and a mess. Unlike others of his clan he steers clear of filth and flies while wallowing in his own mess. 

South Africans are an amorphous group with outstanding ability and purpose on the one hand. They could produce a Wadley with his near photographic memory that could design a tellurometer and find use for it worldwide.

The country could create offspring like Daniel Chauvier and his father Ferdi, to invent the Kreepy Krauly pool cleaner.

Yes South Africans could glue the world with Pratley Putty, stabilize rough seas with dolosse, and provide earth shattering noise with vuvuzelas. They can even have an impact on the design of Mars rover Curiosity.

Or they can sit absolutely motionless in the sun for the best of day while waiting for another handout from a benevolent creator.

But one thing they cannot do is design a latch for a toilet door that has less that nine moving parts. Impossible. And not for idle fingers either.

We would rather, like a cracked nut, replace repeatedly a broken or vandalized toilet latch. Witness this process of destruction over and over again and never tire of seeing this monotonous repetition. Perhaps it is the in-between period of non-functionally that breaks the spell, allows respite for the awake periods of the mind.

We never consider that this latch can be designed to be more efficient, robust and purposeful. That they can actually work with just two or three moving parts. That they do not need to be a source of enterprise for the scrap metal dealer. That their parts do not need to end up as ornaments for the neck or arm of the well dressed. Or as toe rings for the fetish.

Can we just have a design for a non-standard toilet door that we will be proud of. Dish out honors, prizes and rewards for the best design. Made from a non-ferrous or other non-exotic metal.

Then even Otto can get on with his business behind the reliably locked door of the little room of privacy.

Otto wonders...


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